On Tuesday, just as I was pulling on my boots to get to the gym for the treadmill followed by boot camp, I get a text message from my Dad saying "westjet is having a seat sale that's over in 60 hours, any chance you can meet me in Vancouver in May?" I am seized with fear. The last time I saw my Dad was about a year and a half ago. I was 40 pounds lighter than I am now. I have a brother & sister in Vancouver that I haven't seen in years and I was 60 pounds lighter than I am now. This goes through my head at lightning speed and then is followed by the weight loss speed math trials. The speedy thought process went exactly like this:
February, March, April, May = 4 months x 4 weeks = 16 weeks.
60 pounds to go ÷ 16 weeks = almost 4 pounds per week - too much.
50 pounds to go ÷ 16 weeks = 3 pounds per week - still too much.
16 weeks × 2 pounds per week = 32 pounds, 32 pounds from now, I'll still be 180 pounds.
If I stick to the goal of one pound per week in 2011, minus 16 pounds from now = still fat. Sigh.
This took me about a minute. I told my Dad I would check at work the next day knowing that it will be okay to take time off then but buying myself a day to digest. I started to get choked up and I wanted to bail on the gym, stay home, watch the Biggest Loser and EAT. But I'd told the girls in the class that I would be there. I composed myself and went but I did it slowly and cost myself a little time on the treadmill.
In boot camp, I was balancing on the exercise ball doing chest presses thinking about a plan. Part of me wants to go apeshit on activity and try to lose weight Biggest Loser-style but I know that's highly unlikely. I'll start off strong, burn out in a few weeks and crash & burn hard in a bag of chips and pail of ice cream. So what I really ended up landing on was my current plan. Tracking, classes, water, consistency. The thing I have to add to that plan now is feeling okay with myself, as is. Being the only one in my family who struggles with weight isn't something I'm often faced with because the vast majority of my family doesn't live near me. So while I know that I won't be where I'd like to be when I go, I'd really like to make the gap smaller. I now have a plane ticket to go from May 18 - 28. I'm excited and terrified.
To make the gap smaller . . . FASTER, I've added some additional daytime activity. Yesterday, I started leaving my desk on the hour every hour for three minutes to do four flights of stairs. My heart rate gets up, it only takes three minutes and by the end of the day, I'd done 28 flights of stairs!! Today, my calves were killing me between the stairs and lunges in barbell blast last night. I still did the stairs on the hour, every hour except I missed 1:00 pm. Guess I just got too carried away in my work, haha! That made today 24 flights. Not sure if I'll be able to do this every day because my calves really do ache but maybe a few days week :) I also added a 15 minutes speed walk around the mall across the street with gym-buddy Lindsay on our coffee break. I'm taking runners to work tomorrow so I'm more prepared for the walk.
And finally, a picture of the pizza I made for supper tonight. It is so yummy. When I used to make pizza, you couldn't see the veggies for the cheese!!